Damocles

I really think I hate my job. I wish I could put my finger on what exactly I hate about it... mostly I think that it's because I panic every time I get to work, or go on my lunch break, or take a second to return a phone call, or sneeze.

I really used to enjoy what I did, and now I'm afraid to even speak about what I do for fear of any chance that my employer may read this.

No employee should be made to feel guilty over a doctor appointment (especially when you disclose health issues BEFORE they hire you). I've only been there for three months and I am exhausted. I have not asked for any time off, and am only requesting an hour for an appointment that my new insurance (from work) requires.

I really wish I knew what I was meant to do. Hey God... baseball bat of bluntness needed here STAT!

I enjoy aspects of my job... when I can develop relationships with my customers and help them get their financial lives back on track, it's extremely rewarding. I even enjoy the angry people because they always leave my office happier then when they entered. I may not sell something to everyone that walks through my door, but that's because I may not think they need something other than someone to listen!

I've never been the type to draw blood for blue ribbons. I am not a sales person, I am an adviser. If I think something is a good fit, I go for it, and if they say no, I may ask why, but I never push. My customers come back to me, time and time again. I value loyalty over sales points any day... I've found that if I take the time to develop the relationship, the points and commission come on their own. My business is an annuitized business, rushing it will NOT create anything positive.

I am tired of having The Sword of Damocles hanging over my head... only fitting that it is suspended by a single horse hair.

USING ONLY ONE WORD!
Not as easy as you might think!
Now copy or forward, change the answers to suit you and pass it on.
It's really hard to only use one word answers.

1. Where is your cell phone? Earth
2. What is the last thing you ate? Zucchini
3. Your hair cut? tousled
4. Your mother? artist
5. Your father? engineer
6. Your favorite thing? freedom
7. Your dream last night? evil
8. Your favorite drink? Martini
9. Your dream/goal? success
10. What Room are you in? Living
11. Your hobby? Ponies
12. Your fear? marriage
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? graduated
14. Where were you last night? basement
15. Something that you aren't? mean-spirited
16. Breakfast? Zucchini
17. Wish list item? Health
18. Where you grew up? Bloomington
19. Last thing you did? fetch
20. What are you wearing? cami
21. Your TV? On
22. Your pets? eclectic
23. Friends? awesome
24. Your life? confusing
25. Your mood? reflective
26. Missing someone? always
27. Your car? vroom
28. Something you're not wearing? ring
29. Your favorite store? http://www.perpetualkid.com/world-wide-fred.aspx
30. Your favorite color? black
31. When is the last time you laughed? yesterday
32. Last time you cried? yesterday (from laughing)
33. Who will resend this? dunno
34. Four places that I go to over and over again? doctor, bar, church, California
35. Four people who email me regularly: Mom, Dad, Rita, Donna
36. Four places I would like to go? Africa, Australia, Italy, Caribbean

Hospital Again...

I'm in Monroe Hospital down in Bloomington again... I can get on FB through a proxy server but I cant post anything in response to anyone... read only.
I've been fighting off a respiratory infection off and on since November which would not be that big of a deal except for the fact that I take immune inhibitors to keep my Crohn's disease in check... so when I started coughing and could not stop we decided to get me in and on i.v. antibiotics and breathing treatments.

I had a C.T. last night and they actually found a septated bullae (sp?) in my upper left lobe (like a blister on your lungs).... still waiting to hear more details as to what the heck that means.

Hopefully this will be something easily treated and I can get out of here soon!
::HuGs::
~K